How Not to Pray for People

I've had my share of experience with praying for people over the years.  Most times when I see a need in someones life I just start praying for them, and I've also had many people come to me with prayer request.  Often times people tell me that they have no one to confide in or trust with their situation, or they say, "The Lord told me to call you."  And whenever I hear that, I'm deeply humbled and the fear of the Lord rises up within me, giving me such a sense of responsibility to do what is right with what has been entrusted to me.  Because it's such a privilege and honor to be able to pray for others.

But when you are the one in need of prayer, you are in a rather vulnerable position; because you are trusting the person praying for you to have the right heart towards you and God.  No one wants to be judged or misunderstood, and we certainly don't want our personal business spread abroad.  And I say this because there is a definite responsibility before God to have our hearts right before Him, especially when it comes to prayer.

God taught me a valuable lesson about the importance of how we are to pray for people through an experience I had while attending a women's conference some years ago.  On the last day of the conference an altar call was given, inviting the women to come forward for prayer for the needs in their lives.   The prayer team lined up across the altar, and the women were eager to pray.  As the altar call was being made, I struggled with whether or not to go up for prayer for a situation I was dealing with.  Remember, the one in need of prayer is the vulnerable one.  And after all,  I'm a prayer worrier in my own right, so why do I need anyone to pray for me, I was thinking.   But after conquering the debate going on in my mind, I stepped out to the nearest aisle and went forward.  I went up to one of the available women and whispered my prayer request in her ear.  I was ready to join my faith with a powerful and anointed prayer, but to my surprise what I experienced was just the opposite.  As I left the altar wiping my tears, I felt discouraged instead of encouraged.  Something had gone terribly wrong.  I had been misunderstood.  And I just couldn't believe what had happened to me.  How could I leave the conference feeling worse than when I came in? The message was dynamic and inspiring, the fellowship was oh so sweet, but in the end the prayer left me disappointed.

The conversation began as I was walking to my car.  I said, "Lord, what is this?  How could this happen to me?  I know I'm not supposed to leave the conference feeling this way."  The Lord began to speak to my heart.  He told me that He allowed that to happen to me, first of all because He knew I could handle it.  And secondly, He told me that He wanted to teach me something.  He said, "This is what happens when my people pray from their heads and not from their hearts."  I immediately understood.  There is a certain way to pray and not to pray for the needs of others.  And I want to share some tips with you so that whenever someone approaches you for prayer they will leave blessed, ministered to, encouraged, and in faith that their need has been met.  Because it is not God's desire for His people to ever be discouraged, disappointed, or misunderstood following prayer.

Make this your common practice:  Confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you can live together whole and healed.  The prayer of a person living right with God is something powerful to be reckoned with.  James 5:16 The Message

7 Tips to Effectively Pray for People

1.  Listen carefully to the request by listening with your heart and not your head.  It is your responsibility to understand the request and pray accordingly.

2.  Allow the Spirit of God to lead you in your prayer.  He will give you the words to say.

3.  Never judge a person's situation.

4.  Don't give your personal thoughts or opinion of what someone should do in any given situation.  You are not there to counsel or give advise, but to pray.

5. Show the love of God, and His compassion and mercy towards people. 

6. Always seal the prayer in faith, giving the assurance that it's done!

7.  If possible, give a hug or a gentle touch on the back and a warm smile at the end of the prayer to  comfort the person as you send them on their way.

These tips are particularly helpful in a church or group setting, but can be applied to any situation where you are praying for the needs of others.  Have you ever had an unusual experience when someone has prayed for you? Please share.

Blessings,

Kathy